For travel I use a Deep Sea Supply plastic back plate and 22 pound lift wing but your comment that
"all seem to be missing at least one item I want and picking individual items is confusing and tricky." tells me you wouldn’t be comfortable configuring a BP&W where you need to add your own harness, D-rings and pockets.
Advice posted on another forum was; So go out and buy the best gear your money will buy, use it for a few years, see other divers using BP&W’s and then sell your gear on here half off to some new diver and buy a BP&W